OK, this is not funny anymore. . .

. . . I have pneumonia. Again.

The doctor doesn’t know why – I don’t think he really cares why, he just wants to get me over it so he can keep poisoning my body.

Which, most likely, is one of the reasons I have pneumonia again – the compromised immune system can’t beat back those germs that healthy people shrug off every day. At least we caught it early again; apparently I am ultra-sensitive to the pressure of fluid building up. Interestingly enough, it is only happening in my left lung, which is the same as the last time. The pulmonary embolisms were one in each lung, but I’ve long had pain in my left chest (heart problems ruled out); and the cancer was in my left breast. No wonder they call it sinister!

The first round of pneumonia responded to Levaquin, which is a very potent antibiotic. On second thought, maybe Dr. Medici is gleefully rubbing his hands together going “mwa-ha-ha-ha” that I have pneumonia, because seriously, this stuff has the potential to be as bad as Taxol and Avastin – it can cause temporary or permanent nerve damage, bleeding problems, seizures, hallucinations, and tendonitis or tendon rupture, amongst the five pages of warnings that came with the cute little bottle.

At any rate, one of the problems it can cause is sleeplessness, and right now, as tired as I am, I cannot sleep. Of course, I couldn’t last night either, so it may be totally unrelated to the Levaquin.

So anyway, that’s how *my* week is going. I’m mildly depressed, and massively annoyed at being sick again – hey, chemo by itself is enough. But Brian is back home from his trip, and that’s wonderful, and the cats have been very cuddly recently. . . hmm, I seem to recall that they were pretty cuddly back the first time. I guess they’re pretty sensitive to this, also. Great – now whenever one of the cats wants to sit on my lap, I’m going to get paranoid. I mean, I woke up this morning with a cat lying on top of me purring – and today I’m diagnosed with pneumonia. Cats as diagnotic tools – guess I won’t go there about whether he was doing a scan or not. Oops, sorry, I went there.

6 Responses to “OK, this is not funny anymore. . .”

  1. March 28, 2009 at 11:16 pm

    oh Julie. I’m still thinking of you, praying for you, and pulling for you. I’m grateful for my health every day and I remember not to complain about the small stuff knowing you, my friend, are struggling. Thanks for the update. I’m sorry I haven’t spoken to you in the office the last few times you’ve been in. I was sick a few weeks ago and didn’t want to expose you! 🙂 I’m glad that helped. Much love coming your way, I hope you get *some* rest tonight.

    • April 4, 2009 at 3:58 pm

      Yeah, I pretty much had been avoiding people when I came in to the office under the general principle of “less contact means less chance for exposure” – and because my time was so limited I was trying to focus on getting the “in-the-office-only” tasks done while I could. I can’t say how much it means that you are always so supportive and caring, and understanding about *my* not being good about keeping contact!

  2. 3 Kevin
    March 30, 2009 at 9:08 am

    Hi Julie,

    Much love coming from me and Dj-san too. I am sorry you have to deal with pneumonia again. Please stay focused on “YOU”. I have had this on my mind lately:

    Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
    and remember what peace there may be in silence.

    As far as possible, without surrender,
    be on good terms with all persons.
    Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
    and listen to others,
    even to the dull and the ignorant;
    they too have their story.
    Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
    they are vexatious to the spirit.

    If you compare yourself with others,
    you may become vain or bitter,
    for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
    Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
    Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
    it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

    Exercise caution in your business affairs,
    for the world is full of trickery.
    But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
    many persons strive for high ideals,
    and everywhere life is full of heroism.
    Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
    Neither be cynical about love,
    for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
    it is as perennial as the grass.

    Take kindly the counsel of the years,
    gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
    Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
    But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
    Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

    Beyond a wholesome discipline,
    be gentle with yourself.
    You are a child of the universe
    no less than the trees and the stars;
    you have a right to be here.

    And whether or not it is clear to you,
    no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

    Therefore be at peace with God,
    whatever you conceive God to be.
    And whatever your labors and aspirations,
    in the noisy confusion of life,
    keep peace in your soul.

    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
    it is still a beautiful world.
    Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

    -Max Ehrmann-

    • April 4, 2009 at 3:55 pm

      Oh Kevin! You always know how to bring tears to my eyes, and warmth to my heart! Thank you so much for being you! Love to you and Darren and the furbabies ;-}

  3. 5 Lynnette
    April 3, 2009 at 12:36 pm

    You are constantly in my thoughts. I hope this month of rest and restoration will give your body the chance it needs to regain strength for beating the cancer. You are an inspiration to me.

    • April 4, 2009 at 3:54 pm

      Thank you for the love and prayers – it always gives me a boost to know people are thinking of me and caring, especially when they’re facing their own challenges. Hope your various family members are doing better!

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